Do you, like me, see yourself as a much younger person than you actually are? I think this phenomenon is similer to the “your eyes are bigger than your stomach” syndrome my father used to remind me of years ago, but now with tasks and chores instead of food. As the consumate DIYer I have always taken pride in being able to “Do it yourself , save money, and finish with a strong sense of accomplishment.” and an in-your-face, contractor atttitude. Can I just say, whoa, those days are fading faster than I’d like.

Now, let’s talk about underlayment or “subfloor,” and you’ll see why I’m telling you all that.

This flip envolves a change of flooring in our rather large, sunny (sometimes) kitchen. In changing from boring vinyl to a more modern laminate click-style flooring it is important to remove the old vinyl flooring and the subfloor to which it is adhered. Please pay attention to the word adhered; we will use several apropriate synonyms later in this blog. This removal ensures that all of the flooring in the kitchen will be at the same height as the flooring in the adjoining rooms.

So, I, the consumate DIYer set out to remove the underlayment. The guy at the floor store, ( who is a friend and was generous to come all the way out to the house with a special saw to cut around the cabinets) said it should only take me a “couple of hours.” The contractor estimated two guys for four to six hours. Which one to believe? Was this a case of the optimist vs. pragmatist? So I watched a couple of Youtube videos, assembled my tools, and set to work with the can-do attitude of the consumate DIYer.

The old vinyl came up easy, maybe too easy. I made my cuts and began to attempt to tear up the neatly cut 18-inch squares of subfloor. )The squares did not come up easily as they were stuck (or affixed, nailed, or connected) by some inexplicable means). What I mean is, they were glued, fastened, conjoined, and an invisble bond had formed. Getting the picture? It was stapled, cemented, superglued, adjoined forever by an unseen force. I had discovered the bonding of atoms; separation would result in certain disaster. Surely an impending doom awaited me….

It was after SEVERAL hours of back-breaking labor, sweating and grunting, that my epiphany came to me. I am not as young as I once was, the generous man at the floor store was a liar (not intentionally, I’m sure) and the contractor is a realist (read experienced). Turns out the floor was nailed, stapled, and glued.

I would like to meet the guy who installed that floor in the first place.